The greatest Briton ever (but he lived before Keith Richards picked up a guitar and before Liz Hurley showed up in that dress) apparently said that history is written by the victors. While we’re figuring out who the victors are, here at the southern tip of the Dark Continent, let me remind you that South Africa’s history used to start on 6 April 1652. Then it changed, and our history started before that, but our international sports records started some 340 years later. And we’re having general elections again later this year. Ex Africa, as the old Roman said …
I therefore claim poetic and driving license in hammering the stake of my existence into the ground on 3 December 2013. As Uncle Bob had it, ” ‘Twas in another lifetime, one of toil and blood …’ ”
A politician rescued me from a group of children who were trying to kill me. The story was covered in the local media. Thank you, JP Smith. The newspaper turned me into a celebrity. When I take him who answers to She Who Must Be Obeyed for a walk, people say, “Oh, you’ve got a new dog.” “Yes; it was rescued from a group of kids …” “Hang on; is this the dog that was in the newspaper?”
Cicely Bloomberg of Adopt-a-Pet found me a home while Christine Leonard and the others at Animal Welfare treated me like royalty; to quote the Nasal Prophet again, “I came in from the wilderness, a creature void of form; ‘Come in,’ she said, ‘I’ll give you shelter from the storm …”
They gave me more than shelter; the top three items on the list were food, food and glorious food. I even had a psychologist. (What a shock when the receptionist at a private vet subsequently recorded me as “indigenous”! I mean, indigenous is the wild dagga against which I cock my leg in the garden …)
Then, on 14 December, I was collected by what was referred to as “a gentleman” in Table View. Some said the term was used in the polite, generic sense. He does have his moments, though; especially when he takes that brown plastic bowl into the garage, where that interesting red and yellow bag is kept.
This is what I looked like on 3 Dec 2013.